Is Healthy Divorce Possible?

healthy divorce, DuPage County divorce attorney, collaborative law, alternative dispute resolutionNo one thinks on their wedding day that their marriage is going to fail. Unfortunately, many marriages do fail, whether that’s in the first five years or later down the road. The end of a marriage can wreak havoc on the individuals involved, both emotionally and physically.

Even after you have had some time to move on from the divorce, your feelings of sadness, lonliness and anger can creep up and catch you off guard. Recognizing these responses is normal, and it is part of the growth process that allows you to move on.

Even though there are emotional challenges with the end of any marriage, it is possible to have a healthy divorce.

The American Psychological Association advises that you should not think of everything as a battle. Litigation often brings out the worst in both parties, which is why you might want to consider whether an alternative dispute resolution, such as collaborative divorce or mediation, might be right for your divorce. This may help to diffuse some tension and allow you and your former spouse to work through pertinent divorce issues on your terms more than litigation would allow.

Divorce can even be healthy for children, according to the APA. Most research indicates that most children are capable of adjusting within two years after the divorce, and that children of high-conflict divorces suffer more emotionally when the parents decide to stay together than when they divorce.

Try to keep any rising conflict during and after the divorce away from your children, as this will only inflame emotional difficulties for young ones. You can be honest with your children, too. Give them advance notice of major life changes, such as moving to a new home.

Healthy divorce is possible, but you need to incorporate opportunities for you, too. Speaking to a psychologist or other mental health professional, for example, can help share some of those feelings and give you strategies to work with them. If you are thinking about divorce, contact an Illinois divorce attorney today.

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